Irene Salter, PhD

Have you ever had a moment where your mouth said one thing and your gut screamed another? A few months ago, I was wrapping up a beautiful sample session with a potential new client. Everything was flowing. And then, when it came time to share my rates, out came the old ones. The ones I'd promised myself I'd retired. What followed was a spiral — shame, justification, bargaining, and a lot of internal name-calling. And underneath all of it, one quiet question I didn't want to look at: What am I...

For me—and for many servant leaders I know—the very idea of power can feel loaded, even dirty. We skirt around its edges without directly confronting it. As soon as we have power, we give it away. So let’s have an open, honest conversation about it. STORY: Welcome to Part 2 of musings about power! Perhaps you’ve already read Part 1 which discusses external abusive power like what you see in a toxic work environment. In contrast, this post is about internal abusive power… my own. READ MORE: ...

I’ve been thinking a lot about power lately because it’s front and center in the local news right now. But power itself is not the problem. Abusive, fear-based power is. It dehumanizes people and systems. But power can also be used collectively, responsibly, and in defense of humane values. For me, this is personal. As a survivor of bullying and sexual abuse, my pattern is to freeze or fawn (not fight or flee) when confronted with abusive power. But like so many of us, I’m learning to rewire...